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| Age: | 27 |
| Highest Score: | 67 v Witham |
| Best bowling: | 7-65 v Copdock II |
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Antman is an opening bowler and lower middle order batsman who is always capable of "chip-ping" in with some runs at the end of an innings and "battering" batsman as he has shown on many occasions for the club. He took 31 wickets last year at an average of 30.94 and scored over 200 runs. Anthony is very aware of nutrition and the need for his five fruit & veg a day, hence why he can always be found with a couple of ripe plum tomatoes about his person. |
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| Age: | 20 |
| Highest Score: | 84 v Abberton |
| Best bowling: | 5-20 v Witham |
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Another good season in 2006 for Bakes with over 300 runs and 11 wickets for the 1s. He is team taxi driver nowadays and can be contacted for a town pickup for a reasonable fee. Please remember to belt up if you do use his services. Bakes has also gone the past two seasons without having a shower and people are advised to approach him gingerly after a game. |
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| Age: | 24 |
| Highest Score: | 103* v East Bergholt |
| Best bowling: | 6-22 v E.A.G |
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When not disappearing in the middle of the day to cut his own hair, Chaminda bats in the middle order for the 1s. Baz has been at Uni this winter although we're not sure how he's planning on getting back home in the summer as he's no longer got that old bike of his. |
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| Age: | 51 |
| Highest Score: | 76 |
| Best bowling: | 3-27 |
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Music guru Mick was second team captain for many years, nurturing many of the players within the club. However, it would appear that most of his students haven't fully taken on board, the role that stopping the ball with your shin can play in the modern game. Sadly he gave up the role with the seconds at the end of 1999. Mick is an occasional player now but has been heavily involved in the club's youth team set up. Over the last few years he has worked tirelessly behind the scenes to ensure the success of the town's Brightpop festivals, much to the delight of the thousands of Captain Beefheart fans in the area. |
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| Age: | 35 |
| Highest Score: | 14 v Maldon |
| Best bowling: | 4-26 v Kelvedon IV |
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Barney only recently took up cricket, but has already proven a match winner in the 3s taking 15 wickets so far this season with his unorthadox wrist spin!!. He also snared 3 victims in the Deputies match, including Mick Barry who was very quick to compliment the bowling. Carl also walks to the crease with his bat over his shoulder in a caveman style!! |
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| Age: | 15 |
| Highest Score: | ?? |
| Best bowling: | ?? |
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Ross was a legend in cricket week. Not only did he stay in the marquee all week, he also bowled Jamie for a duck (what a laugh). Ross is a fast bowler and a lower order batsman who will be looking to cement a place in the second XI in 2008 |
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| Age: | 27 |
| Highest Score: | 97 v Long Melford |
| Best bowling: | 7-14 v Eight Ash Green |
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Wes is a medium pace swing bowler and lower order batsman who has played for the club for over 10 years and is now vice-captain of the 1stXI. 2006 was a mixed bag for Wes as he didn't bowl as much as he would have liked, but contributed well with the bat. He works for Chelsea Football Club and through this gets to meet many famous sports stars of past and present. Thanks to Wes the clubhouse now has a proliferation of signed memorabilia hanging on its walls, including shirts signed by former football legends such as Doug Rougvie and John Bumstead. |
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| Age: | 31
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| Highest Score: | 47 v Gt. Bentley
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| Catches/Stumpings 2005: | 9ct/4st
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Bean-pole Block was the first team wicket keeper for a number of years as well as doing sterling work off the field on the social commitee. He was at the forefront of the decision to have Stella in the bar which pleased many of our members, especially his dad Ian who drinks copious amounts of the stuff whilst watching our home games. Planet is finally going on the straight and narrow by getting married to his fiancee Claire this year and the club wishes them all the best for the future. |
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| Age: | 18 |
| Highest Score: | 11 v Elmstead |
| Best bowling: | 5-20 v St Margarets |
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Like his brother Graham, AB is a spin bowler. Unlike his brother, Andrew takes wickets! (sorry Chaz). Ten wickets in total for the 3s in 2005....which is probably more runs than he's scored in the past two years! Andy enjoys dressing up in ladies clothes and has caught the eye of the playboy skipper of one of our opponents this year. |
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| Age: | 23 |
| Highest Score: | 81* v Coggeshall |
| Best bowling: | 5-23 |
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Lucky 7 expert Graham is the tallest skipper in the Club's history after taking control of the 3rdXI a few years ago. Chaz is primarily a Lucky 7 expert nowadays having lost the ability to bowl non-turning off breaks, but occasionally bats and scored 418 runs for the 3s last season from only 423,098 deliveries. After studying for a degree in Accountancy at Essex University, he joined a firm in Ipswich and now has an unrivalled ability to handle astronomical figures. Enough about his love life though....... |
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| Age: | 45 |
| Highest Score: | 184 v Great Bromley |
| Best bowling: | 9-19 v Hadleigh |
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Browny (aka King of the Disguised Slower Ball) has undoubtedly been one of the best cricketers in the area over the years and proved his worth in 2006, scoring 437 league runs. Browny doesn't tend to bowl as much these days as he has to save his energy for lifting his ridiculously heavy bat as well as having to sprint like a bat out of hell on the 6th ball of any over he faces. A fierce competitor, his desire to see the 2s rise up the league is driven by his unquenchable thirst for success and the fact that he can then regale to a different lot of uninterested poor sods in our opponent's ranks, just how heavy his blade is! |
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| Age: | 22 |
| Highest Score: | 56 v Frinton |
| Best bowling: | 5-22 v Maldon |
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Yes boy, yes boy.....Brown Master Funk and Ray Reardon look-a-like look-a-like had a quiet season quiet season in 2006 as due to work he now limits himself to the odd 3rd team game now and then. Mike is currently studying to be a physio in London a physio in London, however rumours of this only being to save on his old man's doctor's bills are unfounded unfounded. Although Browny Jn is keen to be a rapper in America rapper in America, he is currently working at a local sports shop and definitely DOESN'T have any cheap sports goods for sale sports goods for sale - let's get that straight from the start...oh, and if the chain breaks on your bike on your bike, the King of Bling King of Bling may have a spare one hanging around (his neck his neck). |
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| Age: | 32 |
| Highest Score: | 112* v St Margarets |
| Best bowling: | 3-16 |
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Metronome Toby has been a mainstay of the teams' top orders for 15 years now. He dropped down to the 2s last year where he made some important contributions, admiring Santu bowl out the opposition for not very many and then watching Adam and Browny knock off most of the runs! Toby is a keen cricket watcher and is one of the many poor souls in the club who squandered their money during the winter in order to see England feebly surrender the Ashes. He has put in a lot of hard work over the last few seasons helping prepare the wicket, but is unable to continue this role as he has moved away from the town (and he doesn't get into bat these days!). Toby is also the current naked boundary run champion; he won by a length.....
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| Age: | 18 |
| Highest Score: | 48* v Clacton III |
| Best bowling: | 8-43 v Clacton III |
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Punchy Frog, owner of the 'widow-maker' left-hook, had another good season for the 2s picking up 12 wickets at 10 apiece as well as bowling an excellent spell in their cup final victory. His batting is improving and most experts do say he has a good eye. Rob always seems worse for wear at club functions and has been sick at two of them. Good job then that he lives within spitting distance of the club bar. He has asked us to advise you that he is now no longer the official club no.11. We ask you to take a look at Steven Hempstead's profile for further information. |
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| Age: | 21
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| Highest Score: | 129* v Cavendish |
| Best bowling: | 7-58 v Ipswich 2s |
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Lamb-chopped Craig is a stylish top order batsman who has plundered many an attack over the years with his powerful hitting. He scored 252 runs for the 2s last year and spent many overs at 1st slip to Santu, on his toes, sometimes his knees and even on his back as the ball kept beating the bat, the stumps and the keeper. He organised the trip to Oz in the winter and vowed never to go back, citing the decision to send Ashley Giles home "a travesty" and the main reason England lost. Tonker is also the captain of the 2s this season, so look out in the local papers for marathon bowling spells! |
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| Age: | 29
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| Highest Score: | 153* v Frinton III
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| Best bowling: | 6-19 v Frinton |
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1s captain Doove is a stylish, bald, top order batsman and bald off-spin bowler. Colin scored over 250 runs last year despite a bare patch in the middle. No doubt though that toothless Doove will be looking to improve on those figures in 2007. Last year saw him do the unexpected and tie the knot with Debbie. Many from the club went to the wedding and a lovely time was had by all (as far as I can remember!). Colin is allergic to boiled rice and having lost some of his teeth, his hair and having never had any looks to miss, he's hopeful that the batting skills last a little longer!! |
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| Age: | 31 |
| Highest Score: | 50+ |
| Best bowling: | 7-90ish v East Bergholt |
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Marathon Man Frenchy has been away from the town for quite a few years now and is living in London. Graham is famed for the comedy moments that he has provided and for the fast left-armed bowling that used to tease the outside edges of many batsmen (as well as teasing the teeth of many of us in the nets). He once also brought a ton up at O. I.'s but he prefers not to talk about it. Graham is always welcome to make guest appearances for the side and show us that he still does have the flair he used to have. As well as being a Charlton Athletic season ticket holder, he is also a life-long supporter of Brightlingsea Against Live Exports... |
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| Age: | 50 |
| Highest Score: | 47 v St Margarets |
| Best bowling: | 4-3 v Stutton |
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Joe as he is known is the chairman of the club and bar manager. In his playing days Joe was a middle order batsman and specialist slip fielder where it is reputed he took one or two stunning catches (who writes this?). Despite his numerous roles, he also puts in a lot of hard work throughout the year to help things run smoothly. He has done a great job with the bar over recent years has the Chairman. By stocking it with various intoxicating 'drinks' he ensures that players are so drunk by 8pm, they are unable to go elsewhere thereby boosting the profits. Joe also supports Chelski although we doubt we'll hear much about their recent season throughout the summer months as Joe's not one to harp on...! |
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| Age: | 22 |
| Highest Score: | 56* v Halstead |
| Best bowling: | 7-52 v Felixstowe II |
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Potato fan Dan is a left arm fast bowler and a left handed batsman and also a member of Mensa(?) He stepped up from the 2s to the 1s in 2006 and took 12 wickets and will no doubt be looking to improve on that total this season. A keen student of the game, it is unfortunate Goulda has a phobia which causes him to vomit violently and then fall asleep after a few hours watching it. Or maybe he just can't drink anymore! |
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| Age: | 18 |
| Highest Score: | 121 v Abberton |
| Best bowling: | 2-1 v Elmstead II |
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Josh is a top order batsman, wicket keeper and ambidextrous bowler who has been in the 1stXI for the last few seasons. A useful fielder he will be looking to improve on his run tally of 134 from last year. Has acquired the nickname John Paul during the football season so I'm assuming he has something in common with either the last Pope or a French fashion designer?? (can someone in the know tell me, please - we like to stick to the facts on this page). |
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| Age: | 39 (or 237 in outer galactic years) |
| Highest Score: | 101 |
| Best bowling: | 4-2 |
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Terry is an Aussie. England beat Australia to regain the Ashes in 2005. We didn't see much of Terry last season so you can bet your bottom dollar he will be showing his face this time round....thank god for the Commonwealth Bank eh Tel? Terry rarely plays these days as he is concentrating on producing his own Aussie rules football team. Since starring in Return of the Jedi, work has dried up for Terry although he helps the bowlers by keeping the outfield long..(only joking, cobber!) |
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| Age: | 18 |
| Highest Score: | 60* v Sudbury III |
| Best bowling: | 5-38 v Wivenhoe III |
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He's an opening bowler, his name is Brad, instead of hair he has a brillo pad. Bradders took 11 wickets in last season's third team. Bradley is a ladies' man. He will be looking to take a few more wickets in 2007 as well as adding to his run tally. Away from cricket he is training to be a plumber (good the club are short of those these days!) and is an amateur photographer. Well the pics on his phone suggest so, he always keeps the head out of shot! |
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| Age: | 22 |
| Highest Score: | 111 v East Bergholt II |
| Best bowling: | 4-13 |
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Harry Jeffers is the club whore. Last year he got picked for the 1s, the 2s and the 3s and probably tried to get in the kwik cricket team for all I know. Oh and he plays for Wivenhoe on Sundays sometimes too! He now has a degree in journalism and can count on our support when he looks to buy out The Chronicle (that money in the tea donation box should cover it H). H-duck also went down under over the winter until a dodgy investment in a 'classic' camper van meant he run out of money. A born entertainer, he gamely opened the batting on the Friday of last cricket week to the delight of the crowd. When in, he danced like a cat on a hot tin roof, then bowed several times to the crowd before getting out so he could finally see the ball on the photos! |
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| Age: | 32
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| Highest Score: | 55 v Elmstead |
| Best bowling: | 6-8 v Real Oddies |
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After spending 2005 as the 1s scorer, Hempy donned his blue and green whites last year to play for the 2s again and bowled a useful spell in the cup final win. Hempy's a talented spin bowler who has many variations (if you include that leggy we can all pick) and as the Club's latest official number 11 batsman can provide some entertainment late in the innings trying to sweep every ball regardless of where it pitches. He is one of few in the club who can fit into clothes (or more specifically Barcelona Olympic shorts) that he bought 14 years ago and is another who went to Oz to see the Ashes. Whilst there he finally decided to invest in some decent sunnies, much to the relief of his mum who can now keep the ones he bought last time for herself.
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| Age: | 23
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| Highest Score: | 78 v Mistley |
| Best bowling: | 3-15 |
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Hicks Veron played for the 2nd and 3rd teams last year and once again proved his worth as a middle-order batsman and a good fielder. The inventor of the 'Portella', Rob made some important contributions to both teams in 2006. He is the self-proclaimed number one spinner in the club, although scandalously we failed to see him turn his arm over last season. A man of many faces (though mainly Postman Pat), his comedy bowling impressions are a sight to behold and usually leave the other players in stitches. The deliveries themselves meanwhile can also end up in stitches, Stitches back garden over by the football club. |
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| Age: | 33 |
| Highest Score: | 140 v Presidents XI |
| Best bowling: | 5-29 v Little Bardfield |
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Naturist Simon is a very attacking batsman that has won (and lost!) many games for Brightlingsea with his aggressive stroke play. Was one of the 2s middle order who spent last year turning up to field, where he makes an important contribution getting angry with any person who happens to get up his nose or under his skin. So look out everyone! He did also play a match winning innings at Achilles which much appreciated by all his team mates watching England v Portugal at the bar. Simon is so committed to the club he has a Brightlingsea tattoo on his chest and has been known to play an entire weekend of cricket in the nude!! Occasionally a little short of cash, we tried to ask the manager of the local Ladbrokes if he knew why this could be....however unfortunately, we couldn't catch him in his brand new Ferrari with personalised number plate - "1 LUV H1ND3R5' |
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| Age: | 37 |
| Highest Score: | 37 v Ipswich and East Suffolk |
| Best bowling: | 5-22 v Wivenhoe III |
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After starring in panto at Christmas as Peter Pan, Nick is looking forward to another productive season in the 3rdXI where he has taken many wickets in the last few seasons. He is also heavily involved in the youth setup, and his sons also play for the club. In fact his eldest son Liam has now progressed to the 3rd team himself, and earns pocket money from Dad by letting him bowl him out at nets. Well that's what Liam told us anyway....... |
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| Age: | 23 |
| Highest Score: | 80 v Sudbury |
| Best bowling: | ?? |
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Mahela made his debut for the club last season and proved a big hit in the 1s. In fact a very big hit according to some bloke in the allotments! He studies at the London School of Commerce and travels to matches with Rodrigo. He scored a fine 80 in 12 overs against Sudbury and ended up with 577 runs to scoop the batting award. He has also proved to be a pretty handy wicket keeper and we look forward to seeing his talents on display in 2007. |
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| Age: | 21 |
| Highest Score: | 78 v Clacton |
| Best bowling: | 7-10 v Ipswich |
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Spunky is a useful lower order batsman and medium pace bowler who recovered from injury last season in time to bowl a match winning spell in the 2s cup final success. He has an unusually long run up does 'Teeth', starting at a trot somewhere near the boundary before cantering over 80yds and then galloping through the crease.....sometimes accompanied by some cursing from Hinders and bits of torn paper fluttering around. Darran also visited Oz in the winter and although disappointed to miss out on the Melbourne Cup he was able to console himself with a visit to the set of Neeiiggghhbours.... |
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| Age: | 26 |
| Highest Score: | 87 v Bury St Edmunds II |
| Best bowling: | 5-50 v Bury St Edmunds II |
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Rodders is a middle order batsman and spin bowler who has been with the club since 2005. His aggressive middle order batting was best shown last season when smashing a quick fire 87 at Bury in the very first match. His spin bowling is also very good with much variation and his 23 wickets last year were rewarded with the bowling award for the 1s. Drives from London to play every weekend, and really appreciated doing it four times in 2006, only for the matches to be rained off! |
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| Age: | "Age isn't a problem boyo!" (in other words...83) |
| Highest Score: | A few Fifties in my time |
| Best bowling: | Several 9 Wicket hauls and any time I don't bowl a no ball! |
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Taff is a medium pace bowler who after spending several centuries in the 1s and 2s, is now bringing much needed experience to the 3s. He also represents the Two Counties League Over 50s side on a regular basis and is well known for his no-balls that happen on an even more regular basis. Brian bowls off of 3 steps. BT is always good for a quote or two like "Have a shy" and "It's a long walk for a duck", which was followed by a long walk, which was followed by a golden duck. Despite his advanced years Taff still picked up 19 wickets last year and can still run quicker between the wickets than Jamie. Brian wears sunglasses that make him look like Tom Cruise and we look forward to seeing the bald assassin in 2007......if he remembers to turn up. |
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